Photo by Priscilla Du Preez
Hello All,
COVID-19 and Provision Update
I want to start by just giving you an update on what life is looking like in light of COVID. I was pretty astounded when I looked back at last month's newsletter and realized that we have jumped up over 6,000 cases in one month. In some ways, that is not surprising since we've seen how quickly this spreads and have had the example of other parts of the world. At the same time, it feels bizarre because--at least on paper--we have been on lockdown for three months. Our hospital system here was dangerously fragile to begin with, but it is collapsed at this point. A lot of the private hospitals won't treat COVID patients, but even the most expensive hospital here that does is at full capacity. The public hospitals are overflowing with patients. Many medical personnel are infected. There is a serious lack of medical supplies like oxygen, medicine, PPE, and ventilators. Nurses in various parts of the city are on strike today specifically because they don't have what they need. We saw the same kinds of things happening in the US and other parts of the world, so we know that this isn't confined to here. But, this is taking place in a country already overrun by government corruption and a kind of hopelessness and inevitability that the poor will suffer at the hands of their leaders that settles in over the nation like a blanket. People read headlines or embassy announcements about money and provision being sent in from other countries, but they aren't seeing in materialize in their reality. To be honest, it feels a bit like we sacrificed three months shut up in our homes for nothing, but there is no way to quantitatively determine that. I imagine that we did probably prevent the inevitable from happening sooner. But there was no point in buying time if the hospitals weren't going to be able to prepare more. So, we are currently at 8,858 cases with 967 recoveries and 312 deaths. The desperation from the medical community is palpable but so is the desperation of those who are hungry after months without work.
The missionary community here has made a lot of intentional effort to work together to make sure that people are being fed; that kind of unity in purpose is encouraging. Yet, there are still communities especially in mountainous or rural areas that are suffering greatly just because of their geographic location. There are no governmental safety nets. In our area, the government has only been to distribute one bag of food per family twice in three months. As a ministry, we have continued to distribute provision bags with Raúl doing almost all of the work. We are currently at 145 provision bags distributed with the plan this week to send some provisions to a transition home for boys run by a pastor friend. We have been blessed by the generosity of many of you who have helped make this ongoing distribution possible. We are making a small dent in the need, but it's a bag of food that does matter to the hand who receives it. Raúl was moved to tears the other day as he told me how thankful he is that finances can be sent to people like Lindsey and myself that can supply for the needs of his hurting countrymen. He mentioned his own memories of how his single mom had to stretch one egg to feed seven people and knows personally the relief that people feel when they receive food for their families. He also told me yesterday of a particular moment that left a mark on him whenever he was distributing food. A little boy who sells bread in our neighborhood has been on our food distribution list for the duration of this quarantine. His father hasn't been able to work, and his mother hasn't been selling bread either. Children are not allowed out of the house right now. When Raúl arrived with the bag of food to the little boy's house, he was told that his mother had just been commenting to the neighbor that she was nearly out of food and didn't know what she was going to do. When Raúl gave them the food, she said that God really did answer her prayers and cared about her needs. Friends, we can't ask for more than this. We care about these people and their hunger, and we also care about their souls and leading them to Jesus and His love for them. This story encouraged us greatly. He is moving through our faithfulness.
Birthday Recap
Raúl and I both celebrated our birthdays last month. So many friends and family members took the time to send us encouraging and loving messages, and we both felt so very seen and richly blessed with the community in our lives (even in the midst of physical isolation). Thank you to all of those who took the time to think of us and make our birthdays special. They were special days in the midst of trying times.
Compassionate Listening
I also just want to mention that while we are physically far away from the US, we are aware and care about what is going on in the US (and other parts of the world) in regard to race. Sometimes, I feel like people in the US often don't know just how much the rest of the world is watching. There is so much hurting going on, and my heart aches for that. I feel very overwhelmed, and I also feel such a wave of grief over how we, as humans, treat one another. This isn't something to cheapen by reducing it to politics. This is too complex of an experience to choose a one-dimensional side. This is a human issue. There is a lot of change that needs to happen, and this current boiling point has been a long time coming. What encourages me is that there is also conversation. I am witnessing much more intentionality in education, listening, and dialogue, and I think that's an excellent starting point. I have said previously that I believe that humility needs to be our guide as we move forward in discerning how to heal so much hurt and how to compassionately bring awareness. I was listening to this conversation this morning and what stood out for me was the importance of letting ourselves be softened. One of the reasons why I have been taking my time to voice my thoughts or feelings in regard to Black Lives Matter or protesting or even just the role that race has played in my own life is 1) because I want to have the humility recognize that my voice is not the one that needs heard the loudest right now and 2) I want to invest in longevity in the conversation and reconciliation of race in relationships. To be honest, because I do like to be aware of what's going on in the world and especially my home country, I often was aware of many of the other cases of African American lives that were infuriatingly and needlessly lost as a result of seeds of fear that are rooted in racism--ingrained or outright. But, I struggled with what to do with that information even though it broke my heart because I always want to be a part of the solution. I don't want to add to the noise, and I feel like a lot of my calling is to be a bridge and find ways to see hard situations from different angles in order to find common ground in relationship. (I'm always playing devil's advocate with my family--I think it drives them nuts.) But, I am learning that not making a decision to be brave in initiating intentional dialogue is still a decision, and silence can be just as hurtful as taking a stand that ends up needing to mature. I don't want to just jump on a bandwagon because this isn't the latest in the news cycle; this is life and reality for my beloved fellow men and women day in and day out. I want to dig deep into what God is saying about how much He loves and cares about the African American community and about His very diverse creation. To do that, I have to let myself sit in the overwhelm and heartbreak, try to feel from the point of view of my brothers and sisters of color, and start to have hard conversations and ask deep questions. Raúl and I, being of two different races, have starting having a lot of these conversations especially in light of knowing that our someday children will be thrust into so many paradoxical situations that will be directly affected by race. We want to be intentional as future parents (this is not a pregnancy announcement) but also intentional as the Body of Christ to be a vessel of love and respect and understanding to all parties. We want to be able to have the maturity to put ourselves in someone else's shoes. We may come to the conclusion, "I get it, but I don't agree with it," but that, in and of itself, is not wasted because it leads to compassion and common ground. We have seen it and lived it in our own marriage, and we know the importance of compassionate listening without the walls of an agenda already formed. Obviously, there are a lot of passionate thoughts on this topic for me, and I will be processing them in a more public way at some point. But, for now, I am leaning into the softening of my heart by the Holy Spirit. I am being intentional in letting the Holy Spirit examine my own heart, and I'm seeking to have better, deeper conversations on this subject.
Playlists
Lindsey and I have continued to worship together, and I have found it to be something that keeps me grounded. When I am feeling overwhelmed and a feeling of hopelessness is creeping in, worship is what brings me back to the foundation of hope in the Author and Finisher of this story--both my own and of humanity's. Here are some of our playlists from the past month:
Not Alone - A lot of the direction I have felt pulled in recently in worship is putting myself in the shoes of others. Letting music be a launch pad for feeling what other people might feel and praying from their perspective. This playlist is both for any of us who have been asking where God is in the midst of so much and also for those of us who aren't grappling with that but want to love well those who are.
My Redeemer by Lindsey - God is our Redeemer who not only sees us right where we are, but He comes to rescue us from slavery and captivity. He will continue to redeem our lives and the world from its sickness, injustice, and fear.
No Place I Would Rather Be - If God is asking us to be broken and to sit with Him and His suffering world, can we sing out with our whole heart that there is no place that we'd rather be? Will we choose to be with Him even when being with Him means feeling His pain and the pain of our brothers and sisters?
We Are One When We Honor One Another - This list is also meant for developing empathy. It's an opportunity to put ourselves in the experiences of others, to remind ourselves of the hurt and the need for redemption of our history, and to honor the voices of black worshipers who carry a legacy of worshiping God in the midst of injustice, oppression, and pain. Can we learn to see the rejected Jesus in the hurts of our fellow mankind? Can we learn to hear how His heart cries out for the blood shed by His beloved sons and daughters? Can we humbly turn our eyes upon Him in our brokenness to teach us how to heal and how to love one another better?
All of My Love,
Sarah
