Eagles and Name Signs

Hello All,
It has been quite a while since I have updated, so I figured I'd go ahead and let you know what's been going on. Thanksgiving break went very well. It was nice to spend some time with my family and to get away from campus for a while.

Last Wednesday, I had the opportunity to speak at Horizons Church youth group where my sister goes on a regular basis. I had no idea what to expect, and to be honest, I had forgotten that I had even agreed to speak until the day before. I am not someone that does much formal preparation when speaking to others, even if it's a large group. I would rather my heart be prepared to be a clean vessel of God's message than have the right words and timing all planned out. I hadn't been in a formal church setting in quite a while, and it had been even longer since I had been in a youth group. It reminded me of my youth group days, and the kids at Horizons were awesome. The praise and worship songs that they played were practically my playlist for this year with "Blessed Be Your Name" and "Lead Me to the Cross." And once again, God had to gently nudge me about another area of life that needed to be surrendered and lost. Speaking went well, and the message that God seemed to give me was the same simple one He resonates in my life on a daily basis--life on God's terms is infinitely better than anything we could imagine for ourselves. He wants us to stop assuming that we know what is best for ourselves and invite Him into every single detail and decision in life. To do that, we must lose all--our dreams, our desires, our hopes, and our fears. We must trust that God knows best and have faith that God loves us perfectly--enough to give us His best. The other day, I was astounded with the realization that God is control of my life. God--the one and only God--loves me enough to take control of my life when I ask Him to. He could completely leave me alone to my own vices, refusing to rescue me from myself. But, He willingly embraces the failure that I am and takes joy in leading me by the hand to Himself and His blessings. I can't help but marvel and His humility in this way. He is all-powerful, yet He doesn't forget me.

Last Saturday, I had a wonderful opportunity to go to Crossroads Deaf Baptist Church in Frederick, Maryland. As part of my sign language class, I was required to experience some elements of deaf culture. I found this church online, and I e-mailed the pastor. Although I was rather nervous because it was a potluck to be held at the pastor's house, and it seemed like a small church (which meant no disappearing into the background), I went this past Sunday. As I sat in my car a bit early, staring at the apartment building and wondering what I had gotten myself into, something God said during my first summer of living in Honduras rang in my ears: "Sarah, is the church My house? Because if it is My house, and you are My child, you are free to move about My house without fear." Thus, with this in mind, and feeling as if God had orchestrated circumstances so as to send me to this place, I went. It was a wonderful experience. While there was only one deaf woman there, she was truly delightful, and we were able to communicate well. It made me miss the early days of Honduras before I could speak the language very well--you learn in those moments that there is more to communication than syllables and syntax. Everyone at the church was so kind and so willing to share with me. We had a service in which the pastor was reminding us to be thankful for all things--even those that seem "bad." After the service, we had a Thanksgiving dinner in the middle of the pastor's home. Somewhere in the midst of passing the stuffing and being offered more sweet potatoes, it hit me that I was sitting in the home of total strangers as they asked me questions about my life and fed me their food off of their plates. They also gave me my name sign in sign language--the letter "s" in a smiling movement near the mouth. I love that total strangers were able to name me in a few hours with a gesture that conveys so much of my heart, a life overflowing with joy.

During my time at Horizons, I sadly realized just how cynical I have become in regard to church. It is so difficult for me to trust the sincerity of other Christians within church settings at times. I have become so jaded with the hierarchy that I am too quick to assume that the system of church and the people within it are only out to sell me something or to use me. I can know logically that this is not true, but experiences have taught me otherwise in some cases. Thus, the people of Crossroads encouraged me greatly. They already knew my reason for being there; they knew that I wasn't looking for a church, and especially due to the distance from my university, I wasn't likely to start going there on a regular basis. But, they treated me as family anyway, and their quiet kindness gave me a warm healing. I also think that this experience gave me a preview of how my life will be lived--dependent on God and free to be welcomed by the kindness of strangers. Overall, although it was out of my comfort zone initially, it was very much a New Testament church kind of experience.

In other thoughts, I recently received my student teaching placement for next semester. I am quite excited. Being a detail-oriented researcher, I googled the school and the teacher with whom I'll be working. The home page welcomed me with a reminder from God that He is always in control: Hedgesville High School: Home of the Eagles! Eagles have become a theme this year. I was given assignment a while back to think of an animal that was representative of me or that represented strength to me in some way. After living at the Eagle's Nest this summer, eagles came rather naturally to my mind. After doing some research, I found that eagles carry some characteristics that offer some interesting spiritual insight:
1) They're master fliers. They are huge birds, and if they put too much effort into flying, they will essentially wear themselves out so much that they'll kill themselves. Thus, their proficiency in flying resides in waiting patiently for a wind thermal to carry them as they soar to where they need to go. On these wind thermals, they fly to heights that no other bird can reach.
2) They're master fishermen.
3) They fly alone.
4) They live on higher ground.
5) They are extremely bold, powerful, and courageous as they fly through storm clouds when most other birds would hide in safety.
6) They are majestic.
7) They are faithful to their mates for life.
8) They are very patient, waiting for their prey sometimes for hours.
9) They have two sets of eyes.
10) They build nests in the wilderness.
11) They have contrasting color patterns and are noticeable from a distance.

With all of that said, after googling my facilitating teacher, I found out that she is award-winning and was the 2007 foreign language teacher in the state. While I don't put much stock in man-pleasing awards, I was interested in what she said during an interview. She mentioned that she incorporates service learning into her Spanish classes and that she believes that the most important part of learning a foreign language is communication. With these comments, I am excited to work with her since I share at least those sentiments. I don't want to jump the gun on this; however, with these things in mind, I can fully see that God is in control of even the smallest details in my life.

At any rate, I'm in the home stretch of this semester and am so thrilled that I will be going to Honduras in a mere 23 days. I feel so very blessed that God is allowing me to go back so soon, and like a fish out of water, I feel as if I need it greatly. I am so thrilled to be able to see my family there again.

Thanks for keeping up with me,

Sarah