Last Day of Teaching

Hello All,

Today was our last day of teaching, and it was memorable mainly because it wasn´t that memorable. I love that about life though--the times that we think are the most pivotal are often anti-climactic, and the times and decisions that we dismiss are often the ones that completely turn our worlds upside down. I can´t help but think that that is the way that God works and is one of His subtle beauties. For Him, every moment and person is precious, and I want that to be the case for me as well.

To be honest, while six weeks have passed so quickly, it is a good thing that we are done teaching. We have no disciplinarian leverage--no grades, no consequences for misbehavior, etc. Thus, the novelty of MC and me as teachers has worn off, and the kids have gotten much bolder. We have done our best to maintain control of the class or to make class interesting enough that they pay attention, but it´s been hit and miss for the past two weeks. Sometimes, I´m ready to just end class early since it is obvious to me that the kids are done. It is very hard to teach in someone else´s classroom. You can´t establish your own rules, and often, we have to rely on the intervention of others to maintain some sense of order. This has always been a difficulty for me within field work at Shepherd as well. It is a learning experience though.

I have also learned a lot from collaborating with other volunteers. There is a lot of give-and-take and necessary humility. No one person can or should be the leader, and we all contribute valuable ideas and saving patience. It has taught me to entrust the education of my students to God, knowing that He knows best what they need to learn. And He has His own ways of opening doors for my students to learn--even if it is not the lessons that I have planned or the subjects that I value the most. I am so grateful for His grace that covers all of my flaws.

As far as ESL is concerned, I believe I have decided that I would like to get my TESOL certification. This experience was a way for me to test the waters to see if I was really interesting in doing so, and I do believe that I am. The level that my students are currently operating in is very basic and requires little training to teach. We teach a lot of vocabulary, and the most we ever covered in grammar was three basic verbs in the present tense only. But, I have had so many people at the church in Tegus ask me to teach them English that I think I would like to be better trained to perhaps give free English classes when I live here. But, it is all in God´s hands, so we shall see.

Today, we had third grade, fifth grade, fourth grade B, and sixth grade. We played bingo with the third grade, and I was pleasantly surprised by how much they actually remembered of the alphabet. Fifth grade also went smoothly as we did worksheets on family vocabulary. I was especially blessed by how many girls wished to participate. Often, it is unbelievably difficult to prompt the girls to be actively involved. Perhaps, it is a cultural trend, but they are often drowned out by the vocal and lively boys. Today, however, the girls actually lined up, excited to give their input. I was quite blessed by this change. Fourth grade B was crazy. We played bingo with them as a review and because they are always begging us to play bingo. They were wild, and we actually ended up ending class early because it was obvious to us that the kids were simply ´´done.´´ We ended with sixth grade which was equally as crazy. They had a quiz today on three verbs. Quiz results are always amusing to me--some kids absolutely shock you with their intelligence and willingness to study although they aren´t vocal in class. Other students that we would expect to do well, don´t simply because they´re goofing off. We intended to finish pen pal letters as our final activity, and it just didn´t happen. The best laid plans . . .
At any rate, it was a typical day of teaching, but it was also a blessed one as well.

Tomorrow is a program, and there are no classes. We are still going to go to Chiligatoro to take pictures, say goodbye, etc., but we won´t be teaching. A lot of our students today asked when we would be back. I was so happy to be able to tell them that when I move here to Honduras that I plan to visit, and that move is not so very far away! I love my students so much. They are so very precious.

Anyway, as a sidenote that I keep forgetting to mention, La Esperanza is so different from Villa Vieja in many ways but often for one simple fact--alcoholism is rampant here. There isn´t too much to do around here, and alcohol tends to be the entertainment. While I am a college kid, and thus, I have been around my share of drunk people, I have been rather amazed by how normal it is to constantly be surrounded by drunk people here. You can be driving down the road or walking along the street and see any number of people just passed out cold after drinking. Their skin bakes in the sun as they sprawl in the middle of the sidewalk in some of the most uncomfortable-looking positions. And no one stops. No one brings them inside. No one calls the police. It is totally expected to just keep walking, leaving them to sleep it off. More than once, we have been on trucks to and from Chiligatoro and have seen old men flopped on the side of the road in the mud, next to mud puddles, still gripping a bag or something else, with their hat still partially on. It is so bizarre to me. There seem to be interesting attitudes to drinking among the young people (mainly the soccer team) that we know here--either they do so readily, or they seem to be turned off by drinking. They´ve no doubt seen the effects on their families which likely influences their own decisions in this regard.

Another element of life here that is considered culturally normal is best described with a Spanish word, ´´pícaro.´´ The dictionary definition of pícaro is ´´sly person; rogue; rascal; vile; low; malicious; sly; naughty.´´ In general here, I have come to understand it as a person (usually a guy) who is crafty and manipulative--for men, trying to get with women that are married or are otherwise attached or cheating on whoever they are with. Among our soccer boys, it is often impossible for us to know which of them are married, attached, have kids, etc. because they never tell the truth. They also lie about their age constantly--usually conveniently closer to our own.

Along with this pícaro tendency is a widespread absence of fathers in the lives of their wives and children. For example, in the family that I live with in Esperanza, there are four sisters (that I have met; there are more siblings I haven´t met), and only one is married. The rest are raising their kids by themselves. This could be in part due to their independent tendencies, but I think it is also a product of their environment. It has to due with the culture of machismo, I know, but it still breaks my heart to see my little brothers growing up without the influence and care of a loving father. It is a generational curse that continues. I have had conversations with Jorge, Angel, and Alan about the importance of being a gentleman, etc., and I have been rather heartbroken at times by what they view as normal when it comes to interacting with women. I have great hopes for mis hermanitos, and I pray often that God would be the Father that they´ve never had.

I know that this is a work that He can do as I have seen the grace and amazing love of God at work in Roy´s life in this way. Roy´s father was married to and had six children with Roy´s mother but left them when Roy was seven. Just from conversations we´ve had, I know that this was one of the most defining incidents in Roy´s life that left much pain in its wake. But, he has also told me the story of how God freed him from unforgiveness and all the hurt that was so deeply rooted in Roy´s heart toward his father. Now, while they aren´t close, Roy has a good relationship with his father, and they do communicate and visit with each other. But, God has also provided Alvin to serve as a loving father who gives advice and reprimands, provision and affirmation to Roy. Alvin is the human father that Roy never had. Furthermore, God has become the ultimate Father for Roy and has moved in his life, teaching him through his own painful experiences and improving his character and his expectations for himself, breaking the generational curse. God is very powerful especially in the realm of families. The power of the Christian family and the love of adoption is so amazing to me, and I know that it is one of the major forces of God´s love in this country. Adoption (not even in an official fashion) is so important to me because everyone wants to be loved without condition.

So, to conclude, please pray for Honduras. Pray that the power of God´s familial love would permeate this place. Pray that He would work in the hearts of men to make them better husbands and fathers, and pray that He would work in the hearts of women to want better for themselves and to wait for God´s best. Pray that He would father the fatherless and fill the voids that so often consume.

With love,
Sarah